Adam Blatner

My wife and I are confessing to the world that we are mild addicts: She doesn’t want to let go of stuff that we may never be able to afford to buy afresh. She was poor as a child and has a residual that way. For me it’s stuff that’s “interesting”— that’s my key. But in fact I have a range of interests and some of the stuff that was very interesting to me years ago are less so—but the devil says, “You might get interested again.” So both of us are facing downsizing, divesting, de-cluttering. It’s by no means easy.

Clutter accumulation is commoner the older you get. Hoarding is a recognizable disorder, and for every hoarder there are ten sub-clinical hoarders and a hundred sub-sub-clinical hoarders. I figure we are sub-clinical…but I’m confessing, ac- knowledging that this is going on, and am intending to divest and go cold turkey.

It’s harder in some ways and also easier that they’ve discovered through blood tests that I have type 2 diabetes and must watch my diet. No more chocolates, etc. It comes at a good time, actually: I was able to give up that stuff fairly easily.

Other friends are getting sick, I’m getting a little tottery, we are rounding out our lives and I want to go into decline consciously. I don’t want to rage against the dying of the light, as Dylan Thomas’ poem suggests. (He was still rather young when he wrote that!) I plan to mellow into ageing, but it won’t be altogether smooth. There are bumps. I do notice myself getting angry, but I channel it, watch it, role play it.   More anon.