A friend asked, \u201c Won\u2019t \u201cthey\u201d be mad?\u201d I replied: Great question. Actually, \u201cthey\u201d hardly know I exist any more. Alas, \u201cthey\u201d haven\u2019t been persecuting me at all since the FBI-CIA have looked at their budget and reassigned priorities. (Just kidding! Not really paranoid!)<\/p>\n
My contact\u2014you know? The one who used to beam threatening messages that were picked up by the antennae implanted in my dental bridge? Sigh: Laid off. I thought, \u201cWhat am I, chopped liver?\u201d One of \u201ctheir\u201d last communications was, \u201cAlas, insufficiently threatening. Bigger fish to fry. \u2018Bye.\u201d<\/p>\n
As a result, I\u2019ve changed sort-of-religions. I no longer am paranoid. I\u2019ve become pro-noid. This is another group that\u2019s out to get me. But they want to help me be enlightened and happy. Much nicer. Of course, I had to convert, and have come to believe that I merit such extraordinary kindness. But there they are. And I sort of know who they are: My angelic platoon. (Ta Daa!).<\/p>\n
Really, I ought to write about them. We all have them, but like Tinkerbelle, you have to sort of believe for them to make contact. Once you do, they shower grace on you. Well, not shower, but drips and sometimes even globs come. It\u2019s a very happy and compelling illusion. It\u2019s not a \u201cdelusion\u201d because I know I\u2019m making all this up. I am happy to be in this new religion.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A friend asked, \u201c Won\u2019t \u201cthey\u201d be mad?\u201d I replied: Great question. Actually, \u201cthey\u201d hardly know I exist any more. Alas, \u201cthey\u201d haven\u2019t been persecuting me at all since the FBI-CIA have looked at their budget and reassigned priorities. (Just kidding! Not really paranoid!) My contact\u2014you know? The one who used to beam threatening messages […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[24,14,23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1850","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-autobiographical","category-foolin","category-whassup"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1850"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1850"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1850\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1851,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1850\/revisions\/1851"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1850"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1850"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blatner.com\/adam\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1850"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}