Adam Blatner

Words and Images from the Mind of Adam Blatner

That Explains Everything

Originally posted on February 9, 2012

“A camel is a horse designed by a committee.” So it has been said. I was pondering the mysteries of the universe, the riddles of existence, and my friend Zordak (the extra-terrestrial buddy who visits from other dimensions, too), reminded me of Universe #9&$(x-1)! , which, he assured me, was not a cuss word, but rather the coordinates, loosely translated, on the trans-dimensional map, of another universe managed by nine small-g gods who have agreed to cooperatively governing that project. That’s all they’ve agreed to, apparently, but on closer examination, things run pretty much the same, although of course quite differently in details. But the riddles and inconsistencies have the same isomorphic properties.9gods

So, what if our cosmos is more the product of, the surface expression of the tempestuous relations among the Greek pantheon? Whoa! What about monotheism, the reigning doctrine? Sounds good, said Zordak, but doesn’t really explain why “this” so radically does not fit with “that.” Mountains of theology seek to rationally coordinate these disjunctions, but when it comes down to it, theologians don’t end up agreeing any more than the nine gods of that other universe.

“Come on!” says I, “You’re just messing with me!” “Maybe,” says Zordak.


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